I love the holidays as much as the next person, but I get a little worried when I start seeing that familiar ol' frenzy kicking in. 

We're already stretched thin in our day-to-day lives. Toss in an ongoing pandemic, flu season and THEN cooking, shopping, decorating, wrapping, a small (or large) dose of family drama, and it's a recipe for a total meltdown.

So, this year, I'm taking a beat. I'm sharing with you the 5 things I'm going to do this holiday season to have less stress and more joy. Let's get those holiday ideas started!

1. Schedule in some happy holidays fun.

Before you start making plans for the holidays, start by making a list of all the things you WANT to do this holiday season. If you could do ONLY the things you love, what would that be? For me, it would be:

• Decorating the tree with holiday music playing and a fire going in the fireplace

• Putting the garland on the staircase and a wreath on the door with battery-powered lights

• Visiting our local light displays and getting hot chocolate or apple cider

• Making peanut butter blossom cookies

• Eating lots of comfort food (but not necessarily being the one to cook it)

2. Make a list of the things you DON'T want to do.

I had a client confess to me recently that she hates the holidays and she spends the entire season just waiting for December 26 to come. On top of parenting and her full-time job, she cooks, cleans, does all of the gift shopping and wrapping and is even charged with making great-grandma's lasagna - with noodles made from SCRATCH. By the end of the season, she's tapped out and resentful.

Now, I may not have gotten myself into a lasagna-noodles-from-scratch type situation, but I have found myself doing things in the past that felt like a holiday "should" and not a holiday "want."

That included:

• Getting a natural tree even though I hated the expense, the pine needles everywhere and the watering

• Putting out a bunch of outside lights that ended up looking a little funky

• Sending paper holiday cards

• Going to holiday parties that I didn't really want to go to

• Cooking holiday foods

• Buying way too many gifts for people

So, guess what? Those things you hate doing? Ahem. You don't. have. to. do. them. Full stop. Will some people be disappointed? Maybe. Will they get over it? Yup.

3. Find the minimum effective dose.

I love this phrase minimum effective dose from Dr. Christine Carter's book The Sweet Spot. It's all about figuring out how to find that "good enough" sweet spot. 

Here are some examples.

• Don't like to send holiday cards? Text your closest, far-away friends and ask them if they can do a FaceTime or Zoom call in pajamas over the holidays.

• Don't want to decorate your whole yard? Put a wreath on the front door and call it a day.

• Tired of all the shopping? Make an agreement with the family that everybody will chose one adult from a hat and all kids have a gift limit of $25.

4. Outsource like heck.

The holidays are a great time to lean on other available resources to get things done. You can only do so much! Think about ways that you let other people, or other tools, do the work for you:

• Order battery-powered lights like these for the front door wreath so that it goes on and off at a certain time.

• Shop local stores who offer gift wrapping (like Monkey Fish Toys in West Chester, PA) or request gift sacks with your Amazon purchases.

• Let the pros do the cooking and order a Thanksgiving dinner to go. Here's an exhaustive list of places like Whole Foods and Bob Evans who will do all the cooking for you. Plus, check out offer from local restaurants.

• Schedule a special one-time cleaning of your house before guests arrive.

5. Sketch out a little holiday planner.

Either on a paper or online calendar, sketch out a plan for the holidays. 

• Add the fun first. Schedule in those things you said you wanted to do. Try Googling "fun things to do for the holidays near me" or "fun holidays for kids near me" to find cool things going on near you that you might not have tried before.

• Add in your travel schedule. Decide which days you'll travel (if this applies) and think of ways to make the travel plan more fun. Cool pit stops? Fun snack mix? Books on tape with holiday stories?

• Plan a vacation day. Decide on a day (or two) when you'll take a nice, long break. Sleep in late. Stay in pajamas.

• Let the kids eat cereal all day. Maybe even book a local hotel with an indoor pool.

So, that's my plan, folks! I'm going to try to take my own advice this year and create a holiday with less stress and more joy. 

What about you? What you are YOU going to let go of this year? What can you outsource? What fun can you add?